I was pretty promiscuous in my twenties but have become more prudish as I head towards my sixties so how come I’ve not only flirted with another but have decided to be fully and wildly abandoned and commit to a month of adultery? Was it going to be a month of getting steamy in the jungle and high on the altitude? You see, if you know me, you’ll know I’ve been wedded to South Africa for several years even though I live in the UK. This was where my next long haul trip would take place particularly as it features so heavily in my trilogy. That’s where I’m creating my one-of-a-kind tour to ‘Wake the Lion in Your Heart’ and so it’s where I need to be to pull that all together – isn’t it?
But on the 5th May I fly to Peru in South America where a whole new love affair is about to begin. I’ve been wrestling with this because it feels like I’m betraying my love for South Africa, and it also feels like I’m betraying my book by unashamedly placing my attention so fully elsewhere.
Pachamama is calling me apparently. Part of me wanted to turn a deaf ear. No, no, no, I am NOT that sort of a woman any more, I wanted to shout. Through my denial of the attraction I became numb to the siren call of Peru. In my head I knew it was an amazing opportunity but my heart had not opened. It was too big a deal to share my love.
So I called in the big guns – someone to intuitively tune in with me to the real end result of my month long sojourn in South America. Was it simply a flirtation to distract my attention? Or did it have some deep and meaningful resonance? The wise and wonderful Claire Gaudry arrived at my door on her broomstick (ok her car!) and we got to work….. we peeled away the outer layers of all the back-and-forth dialogue in my head and climbed under the covers of why I thought I was going. Like miners we dug till we found the golden seam of truth…..
A multi-faceted gem emerged. An engagement ring of sorts. But not one to take me away from my first love of South Africa but rather to enhance it. This sparkling gem is way beyond the fact I’m going to Peru because I’m working with Andy Metcalfe on his Outer Travels Inner Journeys business, although of course that’s what I’ll do. Our intuition showed in glorious technicolour that the deeper reasons for me going to this new continent is to experience myself in a whole new way, letting go of the last vestiges of who I think I should be to embrace the ‘all of me’ including a far deeper sense of my own womanhood and my soul path. Free and feminine.
I had started reading ‘The Shaman in Stilettos’ by Anna Hunt to see if it would help me connect before Claire arrived. I had just read about the Pachamama stone at Machu Picchu which people touch to reconnect to the ‘mother’, the sacred feminine, when the dogs barking heralded my eagerly awaited guest. Interesting that aspect of my journey to Peru matches so synchronistically. And interesting that the theme of my trilogy, even though it takes place in South Africa is ‘the resurrection of the feminine’.*
Perhaps ultimately there are no mistakes and this kind of ‘bit on the side’ is good for you.
What have you been flirting with recently? Could there be more than a distraction inherent in that attraction? What potential might it catalyse within you? We are all inherently diamonds but many of us are still covered in the soil of our assumptions and beliefs. Luckily it’s fertile soil and once we emerge…well, who knows what marvellousness will shine forth.
*Big thanks to Outer Travels Inner Journeys which hosts this stunning photo!